Sunday, November 28, 2010

Angel Babies

Angel Babies is a site dedicated to second and third trimester loss. It was started by a woman whose 5-week premature baby lived 3 hours.

There is a brochure for parents; as I read through it I was impressed by all of the things I wouldn't have thought of. The brochure talks about options and things to consider for a birth plan, ways to commemorate the baby's brief life, handling the baby's remains, even how to involve siblings.

There is also a section devoted to what family and friends can do to help. One theme running through the comments is how important it is to acknowledge the loss. There were several comments like this one that just made my heart ache for the grieving mother:

*I hated feeling like I had the plague when I finally had the guts to go back to church a month after I had her because no one would look at me. Saying that they are "sorry" is better than saying nothing at all.

There were also some reminders that cards and emails are wonderful because the person can open them when they are ready and can look back on them when they are feeling down. I loved the way this woman put it:

*It would have been nice if people had emailed me instead of calling. That way I could have read or responded to emails in my own time instead of having someone on the phone that I may or may not be up to talking to.

Another thing I found eye opening was the comments about remembering the grieving father:

*A lot of my husband's coworkers donated some of their own time off to him so he didn't have to take his own. He had a total of a week's worth of time off donated to him.

*One thing my husband has talked about on more than one occasion was that he wished people remembered to ask about him and how he was doing. He lost a daughter too, it wasn't just me.

This web site is a wonderful resource!

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